It's a fear I think we all face at some point in our life... that we truly know nothing about what we are supposed to know so much about... the moment of complete epic failure that is always in the back of your mind. I have those moments frequently, that I wont be good enough or I will not succeed. I had my huge comprehensive test on Tuesday morning. I studied, took a practice exam online and got 5% less than what I knew I needed to pass the comp the following day... I was stressing, gave up the books for the night and crawled into bed early for the sake of my poor self esteem was on a downward spiral of how much I still need to know to succeed! The next day I woke up late or well for the lack of wanting to take the test had Alex hit the snooze a few too many times but I pulled myself together and made it in time to take this test that I was dreading.
Two hours later I was finally finished and passed! As happy as I was my dear lovely people in my life could only say "I knew you would pass". I love them and appreciate it but seriously no congratulations or celebrating because they expected me to pass!?! How does that work? Oh well I still love them all and am happy that its over. Now I have to take another but I don't have to pass (but I will) and just finish my 120 hours. This program is almost over and I'm feeling like a nurse!! Less than a month to go, NCLEX and then who knows?!