I truly believe that everyday of my life I should learn something new, I also believe that knowledge is more valuable than all the gold in the world. What I have learned this weekend is that a mother's love runs so deep that when their child hurts they hurt regardless of the age of that child. Today I seen that first hand, Alex and I was talking to my mom about our trip when my mom got tears in her eyes because she knew I had been attacked in an unexpected way. Her response as always "I can't believe they treat you like that when I treat their son like gold!" Of course that's what I would expect my mom to say but the tears in her eyes put a whole new meaning to it. I imagined if the tables were turned and it was my parents that did the attacking on my husband, what would their response be to the situation. It scary to think that kids are raised in a sheltered loving environment and then they fall in love move away and are sent out into the world of harsh people, but not only that many times the person they love has a family and the pain and harshness comes straight from people who should love you because their child loves you.
This weekend I also learned that I am not alone. There are many many many people who have in law issues. I am thankful that I am not alone for the simple fact I have reached the dead end road of the relationship. I am done. As rough as that sounds there's only so much anyone should have to put up with and I have reached that limit, unfortunately there are other sides to every story and I have to think about my husband and our future child. Do I really want to subject a small person to this kind of atmosphere? Most certainly not, nor will I. I believe that children should be raised in the way they should go, sheltered somewhat, loved and most of all always always always loved and being around them makes me feel the complete opposite. This is where I am glad I am not alone, I am letting go of my past dreams and hopes of ever having a good relationship with them. I am currently reading a book on the subject "Toxic In-Laws" "Loving strategies for protecting your marriage" by Susan Forward, Ph.D. The main thing I have learned so far is just that. I need to give up my idealizations and dreams that I had hoped would come to be. I am not able to change them, I can only change the way I react to them. Now I just started reading this book but am so far very very very thankful that I found some advice on how to deal.
The other thing I learned is that I love my husband and I will not allow that to be overshadowed my anything.
I hope you learned something this weekend as well!